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**Andy_Tracey** · 12-08-2008, 06:48 AM

The Spider Story

One winter’s night I decided to go to bed early and watch TV.
It was dark, the lights were out and the room was lit only by the eerie glow of the TV.
After a while I saw IT, a big spider crawling up the left hand side of the TV.
It perched itself on top of the TV and stayed there.
This thing was huge, at least the size of a 50 pence piece or a quarter in the US.
I had two choices, either I sleep down stairs in the lounge or the spider gets it!
Plan A never ever works so I reached over for a magazine, carefully ensuring that I never lose eye contact with my tormentor.
I roll up the mag, climb out of bed absolutely naked, and creep the 15 feet or so to the TV.
I get within 4 feet of the monster and the bloody thing jumped off the TV straight into my face!
The blood left my legs and I hit the floor like a sack of potatoes!
I recovered in seconds that felt like ages and switched on the lights, needless to say the monster was gone.
I spent the rest of the night sleeping on the sofa in the lounge.
When I went to bed the next night it was with the lights on.
While I was watching TV something caught the corner of my eye slightly behind me.
Turning my head I saw it … the cutest grasshopper I have ever seen!!!
I picked it up and put it out the front door!

True Story!
No creatures came to any harm during this terrifying ordeal!!!

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