WoodenGypsy

Posts: 182

Passion

I know what you may say. I have heard it before."You have two beautiful kids." "You were married for 6 years."" You must know." " You have to know what Passion is." "You must have known it at some point." Passion. What is Passion? I know the drive to get a drawing just perfect. I know the longing for the design to be magical, once its finished in wood.Is this Passion? Perfection, Longing, Desire, Magic. These are words I've heard used to discribe it. I know these desires in my work. I know this in what I want for my kids. Therefore I know this Passion. "No." "This is not the same." " The Passion between two people in love."" You must know this Passion." And if I had wouldn't I remember? Isn't Passion this 'Great' feeling? Feeling of what? I don't know how to explain it. I can't. I can't think of even one single moment fo feeling this "Great Passion."If it is such a wonderful feeling why can't I explain it? I see the smiles on peoples faces when they talk to me, when they say I must know. You can see it there, there in the eyes, they become bright, alive, with Love. Then you see the sadness when they look back at me. Then they know I'm not kidding. They know its all just words to me. If you are blind how can you discribe a summer sunset? If you are deaf how can you hear the sounds of a baby chick chirping for the first time?Its all words, if you have never experienced something how can you discribe how it feels. Words, letters of the alphabet put into certain order to speak what you do or do not know. When you know you can feel it,see it, express it, show it.It becomes a feeling with out any words needed.Passion is a feeling, something to be expressed something people can see in you. They don't see it in me,I have the words I see it in other people but can not express something I have never felt."Thats so sad." Why its only sad if you believe it will never happen. "You should find it" How? How do you find something when you don't know what you are looking for? What is Passion? You can't show it to me, you dont' feel it for me.So what is it?It is different for every person. Just because you have seen it in your heart, as you say, don't mean that it will be the same for me.Or does it? Noone can tell me what it is. I can not look for some thing I have no Idea what it is. So tell me does Passion really exist? Have I felt it. How do I know? I must know it is so Great a feeling. Passion! How do you find it? Have I? I couldnt' of found it cause with such a feeling you couldn't forget it. Could you? Passion! Is this it, all that I have seen and done could this be it? Is this the Passion that everyone is so in Love with? Well then if it is then so be it. Maybe tomorrow I will see what all the fuss is about. "You just don't understand" They tell me this too. Is that what you are thinking? Maybe so, but again I ask you how can a blind woman see a summer sunset and tell you about it? This is what I know these are my words. I can not change them into a feeling I have never felt. I know now we have the "You are crazy," "wierd, " or how about this one: "There is something wrong with you." I'm sure some of you aren't saying these words but there are a few that may be feeling them.I do apologize if you do, but think about it for a moment. Is it so hard to believe that someone like me could go through her life, so far, with out feeling some of the things you may see or feel everyday in your life? Its hard to see that someone may not have experienced some things that maybe seem simple to you. There are people in this world who have never seen a summer sunset. Why would it be easy to believe that and not this? Sometimes I have a hard time believing it myself, But I can't see that it is not true. Someone, anyone can prove me wrong if they feel they can.





I wrote this a long time ago, Well it seems like a long time ago I found it lost in a notebook in my head. I'm not sure why I wanted to share it with you, but I did.I have learned alot of things in my life alot of them where hard and alot of them make me who I am today. But there is one thing that still is true I don't know what Passion is. There is alot of people who say all the things I have wrote about me saying that and they still do. This story has not ended yet because I am still here and I still have time. I hope never expect.